The wisdom develops over time, we might not even realize that the
catalyst occurred. This whisper of spirit which sends me on a new path.
That which my spirit, my soul, desires...I begin to manifest.
Slowly, imperceptibly at first. I swore my first ceremony did nothing
more for me than make me throw up and then go to sleep. It was a bit of a
disappointment really. I cried as I carried the effluence of my purging
the previous night to the forest for a proper burial. Nothing seemed different,
and yet EVERYTHING had changed. The wisdom of the spirit grows over the
ensuing weeks, months and years. Ayahuasca magnifies, shapes and molds me
into the desire of my soul. I did participate in a subsequent Ayahuasca
ceremony. Every time I go into a dark room and open the drapes, the light
becomes brighter. With each Ayahuasca ceremony, the lighted path of my destiny
comes into sharper focus. This is not an easy road. This is scary
sometimes; one must be in a very safe, supportive and loving environment in order
to have the freedom to surrender to spirit. To purge, to laugh, cry, sing,
chant, and to face physical separation with no fear and no judgment.
I was able to be completely myself and have my experience
without judgment. I was seen in a spirit of gratitude and joy for the
freedom that I was experiencing... to be able to purge and fully participate in
my experience. They call it work ... every time one cries, vomits, sings,
laughs. Circle members who have never sung in front of anyone else in their
entire lives become free to sing. Ayahuasca enables me to become aware of
my fears, and to overcome them. Primary barriers to my growth and enlightenment
begin to crumble.
I was able to absolutely trust the people in my tribe, taking joy
in my surrender and connection. When I was able to trust, miraculous things
happened, and it cannot be put into words. As I was talking to people
throughout the day, the word "speechless" would often come up…we
could not put words to it. There was this beauty in connecting with my
tribe on that level... the amount of love, non-judgment, compassion, safety...
it’s just mind blowing. This is not a wonder drug, it cannot fix
everything in my life; it only allows me to see a more accurate perspective, as
well as my power to grow within those new concepts...to be clear about what is
important.
I offer a heartfelt thanks to One Tribe! Aaaaho Ivan, Aurelis,
Milagros, Ellen and all of the women and children who joined us that beautiful
winter weekend in
Puerto Rico! Thank you to Momma Ayahuasca for giving me exactly
what I need in the proper place and time. Ire ooooo Ayodele Awolana (Momma Ayo)
